The Co-19 Project (archived)

The Co 19 Project is about
communication
cooperation
collaboration
commiseration
cohabitation
coadaptation
coeducation
and so much more…
The Co 19 project is for everyone! You don’t need to be an artist or writer.

This is called the Co 19 Project, not only because of Covid-19, but because the prefix ‘co’ means with, joined, and together. Also because it is likely that we are 19 months away from an accessible vaccine.

The Co 19 project is a collaborative effort. Bringing together the global community and offering a place for people to share their voices, experience, creativity, or simply a few thoughts.

There is no minimum and there is no maximum.

All your highs and all your lows are important for all of us to hear.

Not only to alleviate our isolation but also to aid in our collective mental health, to share our sorrow and our joys.
This is a long-term project that seeks to gather the collective experiences of our global community under the threat of the corona virus pandemic.
We have all had to change our lives so drastically and so quickly.
Some losing our livelihoods.
Some losing our loved ones.
Some risking themselves to make sure the rest of us come out of this.

There is a long road ahead and it is important for us to document what we go through, beyond the media outlets and beyond our social networking.
We are undergoing unprecedented fear, anxiety, strains, illnesses, challenges, accomplishments and victories as a result of our new Covid-19 lives.

We are all in different stages with this across the planet.
Your voice needs to be heard.
If this virus has taught us anything, it is how intrinsically connected we all are to each other.

This is a place for you to express your fears, concerns, troubles, joys, creativity, and accomplishments in relationship to the new world in which we find ourselves. Use this project as your excuse to journal or to give the kids a project to do. Use this project to scream out in joy or pain.
A few selections will be shown on this website-anonymously if you so choose.

This is a collaborative work in progress.
The project will change as we change.
The project will grow as we grow.
We are all in this together.

This is a collaboration between all of us around the globe.

find out how to participate here
support the project via paypal here
follow us on intsagram here

please use the menu at the top of your screen for more

Wishing you health and strength.
Thank you

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Please allow for images to load.
Grateful for so many submissions since this started in mid-March 2020.
You are encouraged to share and join the project.
Thank you and enjoy!

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my friend died early this morning
my sense of any security I had is gone
my friend died of complications with the virus after surgery
my life
my families life
is turned upside down
the virus I could handle
i don’t mind staying in
away from people
but this is hard
we will be sad and stressed and mad for awhile
a long time
but this whole thing is terrible
this virus
it’s taking people down hard and fast
can’t hug our people when we need it most
let’s make it the best virus ever
let’s do this
then talk about it in 20 years
-SEATTLE

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My village suffered a terrible blow yesterday. A young family man committed suicide. He was part of our community.
Whether the Covid-19 situation contributed to his depression, we don’t know.
My village narrowly escaped storm Ciara but were overwhelmed by Storm Desmond and eight months later in August by another deluge. Many had returned to their own newly restored homes. It was shattering.
The people who were flooded by Ciara and Dennis in February need remembering, as they are struggling horribly. So please remember the communities of Llanwryst, Pontypridd, East Cowick, Littleborough, Radcliffe, Stoneclough, Mytholmroyd, Hebden Bridge, Worcester, Bewdley, et al.
There are people there who will not be sleeping in their own warm beds tonight, struggling with all that being flooded entails, and in addition with Covid-19
The Covid,19 outbreak is just one more thing for us to bear as a community.
Our tiny village is now like a war zone with the everyone helping one another in order to stay strong.
I just thank goodness that I live amongst these people.
Family, love, and respect are paramount.
-UK

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Hello world,
I work in the U.S. food distribution business and let me just tell you: there are thousands of mostly unskilled laborers working 12-18 hours a day to help keep groceries your the shelves. They’ve been doing this for almost 3 weeks now.
This post is a shout-out to them!!
THANK YOU!!!
-Clyde, California

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“We’re going to make it because I love New York, and I love New York because New York loves you. New York loves all of you. Black and white and brown and Asian and short and tall and gay and straight. New York loves everyone. That’s why I love New York. It always has, it always will. And at the end of the day, my friends, even if it is a long day, and this is a long day, love wins. Always. And it will win again through this virus. Thank you.”
– Governor Andrew Cuomo (in case you were wondering what a political leader sounds like even in a moment of unimaginable crisis)

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Before the virus: we need to do something about this homeless crisis, people are sleeping on the street and the shelters are overcrowded. The situation is complicated and we’re exploring options blah blah blah
After the Virus: We rented hotel rooms, plenty of room for everyone.
-Oakland, California

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We can despair today, as long as we let our despair radicalize us for a better tomorrow. There’s no room for despair tomorrow.
-a nurse in Philly

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I AM ONE OF YOU. I’m young and healthy with no medical history or preexisting medical conditions at all. I am not the demographic to worry about dying from this virus. Yet, here I am, as sick as I have ever been with Covid19. I’ve been sick for two weeks. After the first 10 days it moved to my lungs. Yesterday I went to the doctor and they confirmed I now have pneumonia. There is fluid in my lungs. My body is not fighting this off fast enough. Today is my sickest day until probably tomorrow because I seem to only be getting worse.
I’m still hopeful I can beat this. It is however a reality that my life is at risk. Covid and pneumonia are a deadly combo. If I was old or had health issues, I’m sure I would have already died. I have prescriptions for the pneumonia but there is nothing to help curb the Covid. The hospitals are slammed with a major lack of medical supplies for this pandemic. THERE ARE NO MORE TESTS in SF. I’ve been told there may be some coming in a week but who knows.
I am a private person so it was very hard for me to share this but I can’t stand reading another selfish post about how your day was disrupted because you cant go to the gym or visit your friend or how people are overreacting. STAY HOME. You could kill your friends and family due to your behavior. I can assure you this is very real. How many of your current friends have asthma? Respiratory issues? Probably more than you know. Maybe your best friend or lover. It’s not something that everyone talks about. It’s not just old people at risk and even if it was, that shouldn’t matter. Protect everyone. CARE.
Essentials means Essentials. Stop making excuses to go out. They put a ban on going out and it’s been abused because MOST people are not taking it serious. So when martial law hits just know it’s because you did not listen and now there is no choice but to force you to stay in to protect the rest of society from you, a deadly virus carrier who cannot choose others over yourself. Stop, chose different.
Maybe you still don’t care…. I for one can tell you I don’t want to die. I never thought I would be here facing that possibility…I’m not the demographic, I’m healthy with good history…this very well could be your story. please, change your mindset. please protect the elderly and compromised. show love, kindness, empathy… put your wants after others needs.
…This message was very hard for me to make both mentally but physically too. I’m incredibly sick. I’m tired, my head is cloudy, my temperature is 102.7, my headache is immense, my lungs are heavy and breathing is harder than normal. my eyes are filled with tears and it’s hard to concentrate. It has taken me over 2 hours to write this… I have an array of medical professionals in my family as well and superstar naturopaths as best friends. I’m good on getting medical advice from you but I appreciate it.
I believe I’m gonna be ok…
I’m fighting…
I’m a dad who loves my sons so they are all the reason I need. Regardless of what happens with me… I have faith in our humanity that we will grow from this and be better.
In the end…everything is gonna be ok.
I love you all. I am grateful for our friendships.
Please take care of each other.

-San Francisco, California

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Social distancing is a privilege. It means you live in a house large enough to practise it. Hand washing is a privilege too. It means you have access to running water. Hand sanitisers are a privilege. It means you have money to buy them. Lockdowns are a privilege. It means you can afford to be at home. Most of the ways to ward the Corona off are accessible only to the affluent. In essence, a disease that was spread by the rich as they flew around the globe will now kill millions of the poor. All of us who are practising social distancing and have imposed a lockdown on ourselves must appreciate how privileged we are. Many Indians won’t be able to do any of this.
-A view from an Indian doctor

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The streets around my corner perch are quiet. The occasional car rolls past – less traffic than on a sunday at 4am. About 2 weeks ago the bar kitty corner and halfway up the block with the neon horseshoe turned off their lights. Even the incessant wail of emergency vehicles that was the background whitenoise of this hot spot neighborhood have been swallowed by the new pervasive quiet. Today it’s raining. Here is a dog walker posting a letter. Here is a man on a bicycle. Two cars waiting at the light – a virtual traffic jam. 

I think it was on Wednesday morning that I had wandered down to Dolores Park to smack some tennis balls against the wall of the court. I still have a PE class as part of my course work at city college so I’m keeping tabs on my exercise as per the instructions. But still – all the days slide together without much in the way of distinction. On my way back to the flat I walked down Valencia for the first time in weeks. I can’t say that the scene I encountered was a surprise but it was grounding. All the pictures of what’s going on in the world via the news and fb and twitter and where ever are dystopian vignettes resembling the intro of 28Days Later- but here this is my neighborhood – the 4 blocks of Valencia between me and the street to the park. 

The crepe place just on my block has closed permanently. The new store with 4 neatly folded t-shirts on a metal table – the one that recently replaced the decade old funky vintage clothing and local art shop – is boarded up and now sports a fresh coat of graffiti. This neighborhood was already in a major flux prior to our new situation. Rents raised past any sort of ability of locals and long time residents and long time business owners. So now the new recessed lighting in the totally remodeled shop front is now also shut off. Part of me wonders if we are going to bounce back from this – what is going to be the fallout for shop owners and small businesses. Oh yes this relief package – and more will come – yes there will be more relief I am sure of it. And yet looking at all these sheets of plywood nailed over doors and windows —- they begin to resemble gravestones —- but that’s just me and my morbid thought process.  

At the same time I can hear the earth and the animals breathing a sigh of relief. You’ve seen the satellite photos of Vastly Improved air quality over some of the major cities. I saw a phone snap of the LA skyline a few days ago – air was clear as a bell. It doesn’t take much extrapolation – and a little more morbid thought process – to come out with the idea that the earth was just sick of our shit (literally) and sent us to our room. Coyotes have been spotted roaming the streets of the mission in broad daylight. Is this a chance for folks to step back and reorder their besmirched ways? Folks who rarely consider how their lifestyle actually fucks up the planet might take heed. Maybe some – but then I see the insane hodgepodge of the american political response and sort of weep. I’m not sure that we deserve the fine game pieces we have or the super fine planet our game pieces are on. I drank some whisky the other night and fantasized about a post virus renaisance – but for that to happen all the greedmongers would have to fucking die. (this is me in my cups) Voting them out etc etc – is all that we can do without resorting to some insanely bloody Americanized version of the French revolution and I worry that voting is going to be majorly fucked with in some way. Folks as old as I am remember the days before all this instant gratification the internet provides – Each week you would get the next issue of the show and there was no binge watching or skipping to the end. You had to fucking wait. And so we wait. 

Downstairs there used to be a deli. It closed last year – the owner sold off the property and retired. The shop stayed empty for months. Now the tall bald guy with the big feet (aka Rory) has rented it. I’ve seen this bloke around the neighborhood – he lives a few blocks away. So now the all too silent silence is scattered away like surprised birds while he runs the saw and plays the music and hammers the wood and demolishes the crappy office wall right below my bedroom. I can hear quite clearly his conversation with another passing neighbor — What’s it going to be says the neighbor. An art gallery says Rory. 

Gods bless him. 

Artists never know when to quit – and maybe that’s what will fucking save us all. 

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It was dark and quiet by the time we stepped down into the porch. S had on one glove, to open the door, and was carrying a kneeling cushion because he was going to look for damage under the car, while I carried the envelope containing Hana’s jury service response letter in a wooden clothes peg, so that for once I wouldn’t have to wear rubber gloves as I left the premises. I stood for two or three tense, dazed minutes behind the car, watching the inspection take place (which I accept, as outside of my own sphere of concern). His torch flashed beams at all angles like an oblivious light house and the peering body doubled over, trousers and shoes lapping the ground. Observing as the knee pad was deposited back into the porch and door closed, I felt gratitude that I was standing still and not interacting with more surfaces. Then we began to walk quickly in the downhill direction of the post box. Crossing into the middle of the deserted road, I zipped up my hood and covered my face up to my eyes with my inner hood, fearful of the proximity of the small terraced houses on either side of the road, in the smokey darkness.
The street was empty of people and no cars came to make us jump back to the footpath. The cambered road was hard to footfall and dry and empty of litter, as if it had become a film set, with an under-layer of the familiar – at once both desolate and loaded, with the unseen bulging presence of packaged life-on-hold.
Passing a line of parked cars, the post box came into view and the sound of a large fan began to crescendo. As I readied my brown envelope on the peg, for the mouth of the red box, the ominous fan noise identified itself, emanating from a green telecommunications box just a few feet away. Sensing potential danger, I was very perplexed as to why the green box would be housing a fan or an air vent.
I turned away to negotiate the crucial docking of the letter into the narrow void of the post box, without touching any of its surrounding metal. In the first attempt the letter lodged, still visible, so that I was forced to prod it twice with the peg to make it fall out of sight.
Suddenly released of my task, I swiftly turned towards home, clutching my hood over my face with greater resolve, so that only one eye scanned the vertical slit of space ahead and I could hear my breath labouring to suck in air as if I were in a diving or space suit. S began to complain repeatedly, asking why I hadn’t told him to cover his face (he must have observed me covering mine). My reply though I may not have said it out loud, was that I hadn’t planned to cover my face but had become afraid of airborne virus once I was already outside.
Soon we were back in the anti-chamber of our own capsule, I threw the peg into a cardboard box, away from the entry hatch and began the foot decontamination, reaching through the gap for the Safe 4 disinfectant spray bottle, awkwardly angling it to the soles of my shoes, the first shoe up onto the indoor floor balancing on it as I sprayed the sole of the other, then his shoes, him stepping indoors, shoes then taken off by foot not hand, and by foot into indoor shoes, then spraying and the near-to-hand mop rubbing the mist over the complete floor, followed by hand washing, coat removal and further hand washing…

With Solid Surfaces In Atmosphere- Sarah Harbridge
describing a night walk to the post box under Coronavirus lockdown in the locality of home

Sarah-West Midlands, UK

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LETTER FROM BOSTON SPA  2^nd April 2020
Good morning.

I want to raise the subject of the BBC.

I do remember well, being crouched over the massive wireless  during the war, (alongside my Great Aunt who always smelt of moth balls) tuning out of Hilversum and into the Light Programme to listen to the news. Almost 20 million people did this each day and those who dared raise their voices – say to ask when dinner (not supper) would be served – would be roundly (that is a naval expression) turned away. Sshhh was the common word spoken at the time.

Friends, I digress. Today I received a letter from the BBC in reply to mine out of which the OED invented the word bland. It was just a roneo-ed sheet with the name erased each time and replaced with the next. I had complained that they had lost all direction of providing balance to their newscasts particularly now when there are so many good, uplifting stories to hear. In the letter were phrases such as ‘….we strive to….’ And ‘….all our efforts are directed,’ ‘….during this difficult time.’ etc etc.

DIFFICULT!! I should coco. The arrogance of the BBC is well known (indeed I have been receiving letters from them for over forty years) but this ‘invasion’ has led them to even greater heights. Ending, naturally in : ‘Be assured that your letter will be read by those highest up the chain of….’ Signed BBC
These times are not difficult, Ladies and Gentlemen, they are nigh on impossible for many. Have we any idea how difficult it must be for a family trapped in a high-rise flat with two bored children whose only skill is to play on their phone? (n.b. I wrote a thesis in 1960 on Le Corbusier and the development of his high-rise buildings in Marseilles stating it would turn out to be a disaster one day). How many husbands and wives, living on the fractured edge of unhappiness, will be able to restrain themselves before their nightmare ends? How many people, living alone, will hang on those sunny memories as if they were straws floating alongside a sinking (cruise) ship?

I repeat, life is not difficult, it is utter madness. The BBC say we have not seen anything like this for a generation. WRONG again. Excuse me for saying this but our band of brothers, are heading towards 80 years of age at the speed of 30km/second, that is 67,000 miles per hour. This is not a generational ‘thing’ – not one of us can recall something like this ever happening in our lifetime. Even during the war, only 6.7% of us were away fighting (by us I don’t mean me, per se just an inclusive term to cover us all) We might have lost many of our comforts at the time (home-made marmalade and Fry’s Balsam) but an entire population wasn’t threatened by an invisible enemy which to all intents and purposes looks like a ping-pong ball with cows teats stuck all over it. The closest thing I can think of is a Dalek with its rubber sink plunger as its ‘gun’, oh, and that voice which sounds like a golf captain’s voice after he loses a round of golf.

Let me leave you with this thought. We are all trying to flatten the curve so the NHS is not overloaded. We may well succeed. In so doing we shall push the numbers back into the five months in which flu abounds – 28,000 people die of flu every year in this country (but no headlines) – which would really push the numbers up into scary country, yet every year this is what happens to the human race. We should at least, place this in perspective. Remember in 1919 between 20 and 40 million people died throughout the world from flu. I am too young to remember this event but, when we begin to feel that slight tremble in our hands and we look more anxiously than normal at the people we adore then believe in our ability to get through anything that is thrown at us.

Richard Newman 2^nd April 2020

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Relax. Just stay home. Except if you need to work. There’s no school though. Why would you risk it? Don’t worry about money, your health is more important than your groceries. You can defer mortgage payments. But you shouldn’t because it’s not a good financial choice. You should stay home, though. Unless you’re essential, we need you to work. How could you put your kids at risk though? You should stay home. But keep paying your bills.

Relax. You can just order groceries. Except if you can’t, then go out to get them. Not often though. Don’t go out much. Except it takes 5 stores to find bread. Don’t forget to wash everything you buy. Just eat what you have at home. But also use this time to do lots of cooking with new recipes. Don’t overeat though, be healthy.

Relax. Take vitamins. Keep up the immune system with lots of vegetables. But you shouldn’t go out for vegetables, just stock up on pantry and non perishables. Only the healthy ones though. It’s okay, we are all stressed, treat yourself to some junk food. Not too much. You need to be healthy and fit in your jeans.

Relax. Get exercise, it will help. Drink more water. Just have a glass of wine. Go for walks. Take naps. Keep a schedule. Work from home. But spend more time with your kids. Use this time to get in shape. Don’t stress over it though. Be easy on yourself. Accomplish something new.

Relax. Don’t touch anything. Disinfect everything. Use this time to clean the house. Stop touching your face. Scrub every surface all day. Ensure your toddler practices social distancing. Don’t worry them, though. Wash your hands for 20 seconds. And again. And now all the kids, too. And again. Why did you even bring them outside? Keep them home. Except you’ll need food. Remember all those new recipes you have time to try.

Relax. Make sure your kids have a schedule. But don’t worry, let them be kids. You can homeschool. You don’t need to homeschool, you’re trying too hard, they’ll be fine if they don’t learn. They still need to graduate this year though so make sure they keep up with school work. It will be fine, don’t push them. Let them enjoy home life. Teach them life lessons. And common core. They’ll remember the good times, so don’t worry them and create positive memories.

Relax. Don’t watch the news. Make sure you’re informed. Keep off social media. Stay connected. Try and focus on the positive. But be sure you know how serious it is. Don’t worry needlessly. Don’t take it too lightly. Don’t let the kids see your fear. Don’t bottle things up.

Relax. Don’t hoard. Do you have enough supplies for your family? What if they get sick, do you have medicine? What if you have to isolate, will you be able to feed the kids for two weeks? Don’t worry about it, though, just focus on now. But be prepared, otherwise you’re just being irresponsible.

Relax. Is that a cough? Does your kid feel hot? Is the tightness in your chest anxiety or the virus? Just breathe. But don’t be irresponsible. Stay home if you feel sick. That’s not sickness that’s your fear. Don’t let your kids outside. Don’t leave them home if you go out. Give them fresh air. Keep them home.

Relax. Someone else has it worse. You can’t complain. Learn meditation. Learn a new language. Learn to relax.
But not too much, because these are scary times.

It’s easy.
It will be fine.
Relax.

anonymous-found online

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6 Week Daily Survival Action Plan during Covid 19 Social Isolation

Carolyn Curtis Magri

Artist, Cover Tutor, Grandmother, Friend and Neighbour aged 67

All Action Points designed to avoid looking at Actions Nos 5, 11, 15, 20, 23, 28

1. Sign in Universal Credit Account on computer warming hands on hot-water-bottle (currently warmer outside than in).

• Drink one cup coffee (to counteract the effects of last night’s herbal Kalms and listening to BBC Sounds App).

• Check diary (to remind myself what day it is!).

• Apply for 3 jobs (in order to get any UC).

• Check Bank Account (for UC)

• Be awake, cheerful and determined.

• Respond to all messages and instructions from Universal Credit staff immediately on receiving.

• Type up daily entry in UC Journal on laptop to prove I am carrying out Actions 1, 2, 3 and 5.

• Eat 3 meals, if can afford it, whilst carrying out actions 1-31 (who said I couldn’t multi-task).

1. Make soup with fresh vegetables for myself and a neighbour (if they last until next organic veg delivery).

1. Check Bank Account and UC Sanctions.

1. Sunrise walk around village to include Heptonstall New Graveyard to check on recent tributes left Sylvia Plath’s place of rest (no flowers, badges, pens, poetry, coins, or candles since lock down). Make sure this action is carried out whilst socially distancing from Stuart (who is unofficial tourist guide in the graveyard and who is over 80) so he can sit on bench I have just wiped with disinfectant wipe.

1. Say ‘Good Morning’ to anyone I see around the village (including villagers, incomers, cats, dogs, hens, cows, pigs).

1. Do Internet Yoga exercises (on the days I can feel my knees).

1. Check Bank Account and UC Sanctions due to lockdown

1. Make drawings to post to grandchildren in UK and abroad (Superman and Frozen).

1. Up-load drawings daily to CCM Web Site, Facebook and Instagram.

1. Communicate with friends, relatives and colleagues (observing 3 Bundle limit), to What’s App Groups (Australia, Cyprus, Belgium, Slovenia and UK) and texts on I Phone.

1. Check College websites and emails re jobs (Employers and Prospective Employers).

• Check Bank Account and additional UC Sanctions due to lockdown

• Walk down steep hill to studio, not forgetting to sign in, to allow other artists to do the same making sure I use disinfectant wipes on every surface I touch including door handles, keys, doors and other surfaces. Do colourfully cheering tribute painting/digital photograph based on S.P. grave tributes placed there over the last year.

• Oops already committing a crime (two walks instead of one even though I never see a soul either on the walk down or in the studio).

• Check Bank Account and extra additional UC Sanctions due to continuing lockdown

• Write ‘Thoughts’ diary

• Write ‘Covid 19’ diary

• Cast drawing spells on the dastardly thing by drawing it out, colour drowning it, line trapping it, scratching it, tracking and tracing it, needling it, stabbing it.

• Check radio and TV news all day for up-dates on new rules and regulations curbing freedoms and giving advice. Watch ‘See Again’ Netflix, BBC I Player, play back-to-back Ingmar Bergman films on ancient DVD player only after 9pm.

• Check Bank Account as per Action 23.

• Reduce life expectancy as on the road to addiction and obesity due to inability to sleep and imbibing at least one glass of red, a gin and tonic and eating 3 large chocolates thereby contributing to the future of society and making way for those younger than myself.

• Decide on type of funeral (Eco)

• Ensure Life Insurance still valid during Covid 19 crisis.

N.B.

My will is on stool by front door of flat.

G. he has a key.

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Here is my Granddad leaving the hospital after 2 weeks! He had tested positive for COVID-19 then ended up having Pneumonia. The drs said he was ‘deteriorating’ and the next 24hrs are ‘critical’ but God!

My Granddad is 84 years old and has beaten COVID-19.

Thank you NHS Staff pic.twitter.com/RuMGiWT2hh

— 🇯🇲 EMPRESS 🇯🇲 (@EmpressSapph) April 6, 2020

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This year started so well for me. I had renewed hope and energy to take my place in the art world. However, once I saw the first news of the Covid-19 virus in China and the doctor who alerted the world and subsequently died from it, I started feeling very panicky. I started feeling nervous about going out and the hermit in me wanted to stay home. So I began to say no to meetings with friends and attending art events and eventually to work that involved leaving my house. I have not set foot outside since three weeks. My mood fluctuates from utter hopelessness and worry to the opposite feeling that all will be well and the planet will heal and we are learning an important lesson that we are all in this together. The only problem is that the younger males in the household are not very conscious of the health hazard for the older members living with them if they continue to go out and meet with friends and allowing friends to come over, despite the quarantine. Lack of consciousness is killing us all.
-anonymous submisstion from a resident of Caracas and Miami

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8AObp2d6Mkc&feature=youtu.be

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The streets of Seattle are quiet. Many times have I begged the heavens to halt this city. It’s always churning, like the foamy spray of the Sound. Now it’s quiet. It’s so quiet. And I wish it wasn’t. Normally, the heartbeat of this city is constantly audible. Events are the life blood of Seattle. It’s so quiet. Almost everyone who works in the event industry has lost their job. Bartenders, servers, security, admin, caterers, performers, photographers, kitchen staff. There’s a significant portion of the city that will starve if enough businesses fail to apply for SBA loans. And even then. . . We’re in rough shape.

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I work in healthcare, long term care for seniors. Everyday I keep a smile on my face, joke with residents but deep down inside I am scared. Scared my residents will get sick. Scared I will get sick. Scared my family will get sick. I smile and reassure everyone. I cry and breakdown when I am in the shower so no one will hear me. Self isolation? It’s in my head as I can never let anyone see how scared I really am. I’m tired. Physically, emotionally and mentally tired. I am getting ready to start another shift, so it’s time to bury those feelings again. I look forward to tonight’s shower.
-Wendy

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Here are the official Coronavirus guidelines:

1. Basically, you can’t leave the house for any reason, but if you have to, then you can.
2. Masks are useless, but maybe you have to wear one, it can save you, it is useless, but maybe it is mandatory as well.
3. Stores are closed, except those that are open.
4. You should not go to hospitals unless you have to go there. Same applies to doctors, you should only go there in case of emergency, provided you are not too sick.
5. This virus is deadly but still not too scary, except that sometimes it actually leads to a global disaster.
6. Gloves won’t help, but they can still help.
7. Everyone needs to stay HOME, but it’s important to GO OUT.
8. There is no shortage of groceries in the supermarket, but there are many things missing when you go there in the evening, but not in the morning. Sometimes.
9. The virus has no effect on children except those it affects.
10. Animals are not affected, but there is still a cat that tested positive in Belgium in February when no one had been tested, plus a few tigers here and there…
11. You will have many symptoms when you are sick, but you can also get sick without symptoms, have symptoms without being sick, or be contagious without having symptoms. Oh, my..
12. In order not to get sick, you have to eat well and exercise, but eat whatever you have on hand and it’s better not to go out, well, but no…
13. It’s better to get some fresh air, but you get looked at very wrong when you get some fresh air, and most importantly, you don’t go to parks or walk. But don’t sit down, except that you can do that now if you are old, but not for too long or if you are pregnant (but not too old).
14. You can’t go to retirement homes, but you have to take care of the elderly and bring food and medication.
15. If you are sick, you can’t go out, but you can go to the pharmacy.
16. You can get restaurant food delivered to the house, which may have been prepared by people who didn’t wear masks or gloves. But you have to have your groceries decontaminated outside for 3 hours. Pizza too?
17. Every disturbing article or disturbing interview starts with “I don’t want to trigger panic, but…”
18. You can’t see your older mother or grandmother, but you can take a taxi and meet an older taxi driver.
19. You can walk around with a friend but not with your family if they don’t live under the same roof.
20. You are safe if you maintain the appropriate social distance, but you can’t go out with friends or strangers at the safe social distance.
21. The virus remains active on different surfaces for two hours, no, four, no, six, no, we didn’t say hours, maybe days? But it takes a damp environment. Oh no, not necessarily.
22. The virus stays in the air – well no, or yes, maybe, especially in a closed room, in one hour a sick person can infect ten, so if it falls, all our children were already infected at school before it was closed. But remember, if you stay at the recommended social distance, however in certain circumstances you should maintain a greater distance, which, studies show, the virus can travel further, maybe.
23. We count the number of deaths but we don’t know how many people are infected as we have only tested so far those who were “almost dead” to find out if that’s what they will die of…
24. We have no treatment, except that there may be one that apparently is not dangerous unless you take too much (which is the case with all medications).
25. We should stay locked up until the virus disappears, but it will only disappear if we achieve collective immunity, so when it circulates… but we must no longer be locked up for that?

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I appear in the autobiography of a world famous actress, part of Hollywood dynasty, on pp 77, 78, and 169. I know it is me, because that is why I got her autobiography. To check it out, to see who I was. She described me at the age of 8 and later, on page 169 when I was seventeen. I don’t remember much of what she described when I was eight, though it would make sense for me not to, since the actress stated I’d been crying my eyes out all of that first night. We were visiting her house, my mother and I, and she and another friend and I shared a room with the actress, sleeping on cots. We were both the same age, the hostess of our sleeping quarters and I. The third girl was eleven.

When I saw those lines, an image sprung up – a vague recollection? – of a huge room in an even bigger house, cast in shadow, illuminated by candlelight. We were performing she wrote, a play, the Old Bard. I have a vague impression, an inkling of an impression, of grownups humoring us, hanging around, watching the show. That’s all that it was. That candlelight room, us kids and the grownups having a jolly old time. Somewhere on the Emerald Isle, a place I’d always wanted to visit but never had in this life.

I do remember, however, the other time she described. When my mother and I picked her up from the airport, she said. There is now, in this new scene, an element of vast space and of light. It makes sense, because we were both older, and the place itself was an abundance of sun rays streaking in any which way. I wanted to go back there so badly in this life, the longing so painful it threatened to tear me up inside.

It was a space of sundance and light, and for those brief seventeen years of my life it was mine, all of it mine. I remember that place so much. And I remember that moment in time the actress described, not what I was wearing, or who was beside me (my mother, the actress wrote, someone she loved very much and had bonded with), though I do have an impression of my mother standing by my side, looking out for the seventeen-year-old girl we had promised to pick up. For a brief moment in time we were sisters, because our mother and father had had a liason (the reason for us being at her father’s house). But that was not something that had really registered upon our eight-year-old minds. Eight, in this life though, is a number I associate with making friends, even when I was a child. It is one of my favorite numbers.

I had three weeks to live from that day we picked my almost-sister up from the airport and drove her home in my car. Funny how I can say it as I’m writing it down. She never mentioned it, but I know as I’m committing these lines to eternity that my mother had let me drive, because I was young, I was happy, and I was still alive.

I also remember the way that the fresh breeze felt on my skin, dancing ever so lightly, an angel’s kiss, like the line from my favorite song. The one that when it was covered so many years later, when I was already an adult in this present life, propelled me right back to where it had begun, that other place, that other time of love, laughter, abundance, and sunlight. When the words of a timeless song could still lift you up. A song that should have been her favorite by all rights, because her name almost rhymed with that line. A song that was still playing in my head when her boyfriend and four of his friends made their way to my driveway to kidnap me at 3:33 in the morning, plunging a knife over and over into my heart because I had not given him the time of day as he had desired, because I was leading him on, he said, like in the song. Which was a tragedy, really, because he so easily could have had her heart. But he never loved her for all that they stayed together for a very long time.

-Juliette Roques, I’m a French citizen, and I grew up as a CCK (Cross Cultural Kid) in Germany and across the US. After graduating high school, I lived in my native Paris, Budapest, across Great Britain, then moved to Berlin before settling in Helsinki, where I am currently based. I am a writer and artist. The blog was created with the purpose of writing a story every 36 hours. Hopefully the stories can help others as well. The intent is to show all the possible thoughts and moods that can run through your head during self-isolation. I am in isolation due to asthma allergies and a chronic illness.
https://talesfromalocalbar.wordpress.com/

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Being more of an introvert, I am resonating with the change from a frantic, noisy city on the rush to the calmer, quieter Sydney Australia. The air is clear, the energy is calmer and people seemed to be more chilled and connected than ever before. Also as a keen Environmentalist, I take solace in knowing the air, water and landscape are in respite from all the human activity and the pollution and effect we have on our world. So Covid-19 for me has added a positiveness to my wellbeing and this is exciting for my creativity as a Biomorphic abstract artist.
GRC-Sydney, Australia

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There’s a DJ playing music in Spain, trapped a-live in my tablet. In an English garden, I am also trapped in my Bluetooth earphones, escaping the kids’ voices playing Fortnite indoors with their cousins in another European country. 
We are so connected, so blessed and grateful that we are not sick, I shouldn’t feel lonely, but I do. Not sure if there is birdsong, the sounds of nature are not as loud as the neighbour’s family chatter, so it’s either dance or the government briefing. 
And I can’t tell if the sky is looking down at us today and smiling. But I’m using blue. No more black, I hate black now. And garden fences.
-Surrey, UK.

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Human Contact Awaits You…… OUT THERE

How grand it was today to get out and attempt to stretch my legs. Yesterday I returned the recycles at the grocer and upon my return my lower back hurt a good bit. While I know this comes from spending two many hours sitting here where I am typing right now at this moment. Poor me, I refuse to exercise. I exercise my mind alright but my limbs say to me, you are gonna pay dearly after this quarantine passes. Nonetheless my destination was Emmaus Westervik. They had a yard sale today (Saturday 18, 2020) and while I suspected the DVD selection would not yield any new treats for me, I went anyway and a strange and wonderful turn of events happened just the same.

When I arrived the hour was 10am. The event was just getting underway. The few binds containing clothes and books seemed mostly meant for children. They were spaced widely apart. I spotted the familiar faces, Peter, Marge and Nancy. They were still busy setting up. They and other volunteers kept going in and out carrying racks for display. Wearing my leather gloves, I flipped through the selection made available. Ah, leave some for others, I thought. The sun was shining on one side of the building and I made my way there. My plastic bag empty and the wind threatening to carry it away, I perched myself on the edge of a wooden plant holder, next to the green bins where folks discard old contributions. Moments later, Peter came. He held a decent distance and we nodded heads. Peter told me in the nicest broken English he could muster. “English is very important. Its all on Facebook and everywhere”. I felt bad, here I was in his country and he was learning my language faster then I his. He showed me a book made for children. It was filled with animal drawing and a mixture of English phrases. The other text was in Swedish. Noticing that I exclaimed, “I study Swedish”. Oh, and your native tongue is Finnish, I continued. Peter said, “if you can use it, its for you. Gratis”. Gratis means free. I accepted the exchange and as I did the sun felt a little extra warmer just then. Peter smiled and left. He vanished behind the wall that separated me from the other attendees and later he reappeared. Peter was being so thoughtful as he brought me a table and a chair. Perhaps he noticed how uncomfortable I was perching my big butt on the edge of that plant holder.

Moments later another man drove up. He pulled just to the curb near where I sat. His name is Phillip. Hey Phil, I said. Phillip rolled down the driver side of his window and announced. “We (he and his wife) are getting rid of some stuff. “Do you listen to vinyl”, he asked. I don’t have a record player but I know you have a good collection. I replied.

Before long, he invited to come take a ride to his home. I could hardly resist, the sun was shining and I had decided to leave the DVD search for others. I was delighted. Knowing  during this pandemic to be seated so close might cause concern for our respective  wives, yet knowing also that one has to trust one’s instincts and  the sunshine as well as Phil’s spontaneous and offer that suggested life wanted me to LIVE to not be rude as so many are apt to be… I did not refuse to a genuine offer. Friendships are important remain and must be nurtured.  Away we went and for an hour, I rambled through Phil’s extensive collection of hard rock albums. Still with no means to play them, I said, you know one day I will have to buy myself a phonograph player. Phil smiled and his wife after wiping the shock from her face told me many a good tale about life in Finland.  Time had passed and I had not visited their home for sometime. She  seemed to relish this unplanned visit. Her tales amused me as they always did.

If you dare to get out and stretch your legs, don’t be surprised if some other opportunities come knocking. You can always get back to your sheltering and get reprimanded by your spouse. Just for trying to be a little more human in these trying times. I know, I did. A good tongue lashing I got and my head as well as my legs began to hurt again.  Stiffness set in but the heart pumps warm blood during this cold clod season. For a few hours, I did enjoy the sunshine and human contact.

Text by J K Stewart
Finland

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Important to start each day by identifying and celebrating the blessings one has. It will create a spirit from which to be constructive in one’s goals and push aside the multitudes of negatives especially in these trying times.
-RH, Cambria, California

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Gain Perspective, Be Reflective
Trying to stay connected,
Whilst not getting infected,

Our nearest & dearest, family or friend,
No one is sure when this will end,

Staying away will break our heart,
But in times like these we have to be smart,

Even though it might be awhile,
We have to do our best to keep our smile,

Hiding away in hibernation,
Making the best of the situation,

People will learn to slow down their pace,
And give themselves a little head space.

When the world is on the brink,
It’s time for us all to stop and think,

Nothing better than contemplation,
Which in the long run, will help the worldwide nation,

Let your creative juices flow,
Take your time, no matter how slow,

Go back to basics, use your imagination,
Use your time wisely during isolation,

Read, write, bake, create,
See this as a brand new slate,

What life lessons will you learn?
It’s not all about the need to earn.

There is a big wide world out there,
Do something new, if you dare,

Though this has been a bit of a scare,
Perhaps Corona will make us take better care,

Of our planet, Mother Earth,
Maybe now you’ll realise how much she’s worth,

She’s not something that can be bought,
But maybe this is what we are being taught,

We are in this together, it’s all our fate,
What will happen, only the virus will dictate,

Even when the world is out of control,
Have faith and spirit in your soul,

It doesn’t matter what mistakes you have made,
In the end, these will fade,

Sometimes the world just isn’t fair,
The suffering within it, one cannot bear,

The earth, and each other we have betrayed,
It’s now up to us, to come to its aid,

Hopefully we will help each other survive,
You never know, we might just thrive.

Corona virus isn’t selective,
No matter where you live, we are a collective.

It’s what we do now as a human race,
That will make the world a better place.

-Hannah Shelmerdine, 34, UK

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Yesterday I boarded the temporary Bus from Hanko, Finland , I did not know its final destination. Helsinki I suppose. Mine was Karis, just over kilometers down the road. I was in need of movies and set my sights on City Loppis Karis . Also since Alko in my own town is closed, I wanted something like wines to sooth our weekend as we go. As we go into week 9 covid19. Oh well, this never ends. But mother nature, she seems to use it all to allow the kids of nature to play. Now it rains ….
Can it stop raining so I can cut the grass? Sit under our apple tree and dream of life after this season? Boarding that bus watching people try to smile, I was ill-prepared. “No money”, said the driver! Pointing toward the cashier at the kiosk nearby, I made a mad dash while he waited, I purchased my ticket. He withdrew his hand as I offered it. Masked faces awaited my arrival , they seemed alien at every other seat. We gonna miss this absence of human contact. Just wait. I found an empty two seats and as I angled my long legs down, the bus turned on to highway 25 and made its way toward Karis. I took out a book and need not ignore the other passengers. This is Finland and social distancing is normal. Beside I was reading about Picasso.
As I immersed in a passage about Cezanne I looked up and out … The sky held this peculiar clouds. The mist of rain falling down in the distance sandwiched in between the clouds were spectacular. I tired to restrain myself.. DON’T DIG your camera out. Just admire this view. Let your soul tell you what its all about. RAINSMOKE came to mind. I think that’s what I will call it. The bus doing about 60, the landscape a mixture of browns under an expanded grey sky- All the while the clouds seemed to try to rise in the mists of rain falling down. It was an illusion. Brought to life by nature.
Have you notice how the pandemic offers us time to look and admire the planet we live upon? Its like a child when he says, “mom, watch me do this…” RAINSMOKE. I think I might try to paint it. Still the utilitarian in my is annoyed by the rain… If it will stop and I cut the grass.. then rest under the apple trees. Such is life as a human being. We are so accustomed to controlling nature. Oh, about my trip, I did get lots of movies and since I don’t know wines, I did my best as I ventured in and out of Alko. My wife usually does the wine picking. I reserve how she reacts to my selections it another day. This story ends like the bus ride eventually did . Time to get off and wait for this season to end. I do have RAINSMOKE to remember. På gång i Raseborg // Raaseporissa tapahtuu Du vet att du är från Ekenäs Finland om du…….. Foreigners in Finland
-JK Stewart, Finland

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Cofid ( Distress)

‘Cofid’ meaning ‘Distress’ in Welsh is pronounced as ‘Covid’ is in English.

Quarantine
Quiet Time
Forty Days… or more
We bind
Confined-
Cocooned and
Fastened.

We sit with all our demons
Our homes our islands
Insulated
from snake-slime

Virus

Febrile energy,
We are a frenzy
Or struck-
By the comforting slump of sleep.

Or the depths

of squeezed-sponge

despair.

Inside our minds
Inside our bodies
Inside our illness
That we will to
Wellness.

We reflect

Distance/ Discord

But connection
Our curate
Our cure-

Is our remedy
Back to healing.

-Catrin Mari – Wales

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Bend the Knee by Chris Sutcliffe-West Yorkshire

George Floyd’s name resonates now in almost every U.S. city

That it needs to be so is far more the pity.

Disaster beckons, over four hundred years and more strange fruit

Police content to continue to hassle, harass and shoot!

History’s voice echoes loud and clear

Brutality and injustice covered by some thin veneer.

People are angry: they’ve had enough – doesn’t justice stand for all?

Deaths in custody multiply: Black Lives Matter is not a new call.

Power built on dirty money, privilege, oppression and exploitation

Where are Emancipation, Self Determination, Empowerment, Liberation?

Today you see a President bent double to promote his own ego

Disgust, contempt, protest and incredulity – you reap what you sow!

You may think you’re smart: you may think you’re clever

You may think you can spout and simply say whatever.

Yes some still flock behind this King’s rotten delusional band

But Babylon is falling: it was foolish to build it on the sand.

People won’t shut up: they won’t sit down

They will take their protests into town.

Do you really think the solution is to send in the army?

Do you really want to invite a tsunami?

Your system, the system, the broken promises, the shattered economy

The poor, the disadvantaged, black communities never were a priority.

The United States of America’s credibility is again all groan and creak

The commitment to peace and justice remains perpetually bleak.

We may beat our breasts but never acknowledge our own bias

Because we are ourselves so often unconfessed liars!

It’s right to ask the question whose neck will be next to break?

Say Amen again to the protest first led by Colin Kaepernick.

BEND THE KNEE !!

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